Well tomorrow is the day that I feel will change every thing. I go back to work. It’s not just that I won’t be spending my days will Elliot- but I won’t be spending them with my husband either. That’s right, he has been with me my WHOLE maternity leave…I’ve been lucky, although not everyone would agree.
Currently my husband is unemployed. Yes, this happened right smack dab in the middle of my maternity leave…perfect timing right? Just when bills are piling up and pay checks are not coming in- why not have your husband lose his job? Well, I think it WAS perfect timing. That first month was terrible for me- having my husband with me was probably the only thing that kept me from having a complete meltdown. The second month? We enjoyed it and were able to parent together 24/7. It’s been pretty great working as a team taking care of Elliot-and we’ve pretty much been on summer vacation together this whole time as a family. Tomorrow I think is a bit of a turning point though….a wake up if you will, vacation is ending. I will go back to work and my husband will stay home with Elliot until he starts work again. This wasn’t “the plan”- the plan was sending Elliot to day care and getting back to our “normal” life – now with Elliot in the mix. So the plan now? Taking it one day at a time. It’s really ALL we can do. We tried planning and look what happened. I remember thinking before any of this was on our radar how we’d never be able to afford a child. We weren’t going to be able to afford day care on both of our salaries…now we’ll have one salary. I was breastfeeding for a number of reasons, a huge one being it was “free”- now we have even MORE expense formula feeding. So am I freaking out a little? Not really. I have seen God provide for us already. Each day there seems to be something new He gives- a way to say, “I got you”…from discounted hospital bills with out me asking- to free formula from perfect strangers and my day care lady just being SUPER understanding and working with us to keep our spot open….I am certain that in this season of life I am going to see God move in our lives in ways I have never seen before. My husband and I pray for that- we can’t say “oops, forget it, God, we were hoping to see you in the form of a new car or higher paying job” (although, heck yes, that would be awesome)…I know He doesn’t always bless in ways that simply equal dollar signs. We are so blessed to really SEE God provide- to have a need that only He can fill. Our faith will be stronger- our belief validated and that is something that truly satisfies us.
So today I am taking it all in…loving on my little man and loving on my husband too. It’s our last day of “vacation” together and tomorrow starts our new normal. The constant of today and every day- God’s with us. He’s loving us- He’s providing for us-He’s our security and the reason we know everything will be alright.
One Day at a Time 
Way to stay positive! Everything will work out as long as you have the right attitude! Good luck back at work!
Thank you…I’m still not quite comprehending that it’s TOMORROW! Eek. I wonder if maternity leave will seem like a dream, as if it never really happened once I get back into a groove at work. We shall see.
How’d it go??
Not bad- at.all. I think being able to leave the house and not be dropping Elliot off at day care helped. Although I know he’d be in good hands there- it’s certainly not a traumatic event leaving him with his Dad. I guess he was all smiles all day…which made me happy and a little sad at the same time 🙂 😦
My fiancé also left his job a month ago when we moved so that I could go to college. In fact, he’s at his first interview right now! It is so nice having the help of dad 24/7. I hope he gets this job so bad, but I will miss having him around. Your family will always treasure the first weeks you all got to be together. When I start to get stressed, I remember that the things I am stressing about are not that big of a deal. Just having a healthy son is a huge blessing because if something were wrong with him my life would be upside down! It’s hard to remember that though, and not get caught up in the little things.
Sunday we watched an online sermon and the pastor mentioned that when we get stressed and worried to look back and see all the blessings God has given us in the past. We have to keep in mind that he will bless us equally in the future. I forget to simply trust God, but remembering that I’m not in this totally alone makes me feel better. 🙂 Good luck at work today!
I will totally look back on this time and be SOOO thankful. My husband and I actually were really surprised at how not sick of each other we were…bodes well for when we retire 😉 Thanks for your comment- it’s so true…if we can remember to look back on all the ways God has come through in the past we really should be able to stand on that and trust Him with our present and future…I’m excited to see how He’ll provide for you guys as well! Best of luck to your fiance!!!